If you’re reading this you’ve probably been assigned to write an essay and you have no idea where to start. Now I’m no scholar but I do know how to pull an essay out of my ass and I thought I’d do you the favour of sharing some tips on how to write an essay that is at least half decent. These are some tips I’ve made up and some that were bludgeoned into my head during high school by persistent teachers (of which I’m grateful for).
OKAY MOTHER FUCKERS CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS PLEASE OKAY GOOD. Y’ALL DOUCHE CANOES BETTER STEP THE FUCK OFF OF GIRLS. MAYBE A GIRL WANTS A CUTE LITTLE FEATHER OF A FLOCK OF BIRDS OR AN ANCHOR ON HER BODY. MAYBE SHE DOESN’T. MAYBE HER GENDER DOESN’T DEFINE OR CONTROL ANY OF THAT. WHO ARE YOU TO MOTHER FUCKING JUDGE HER FOR WHATEVER SHE GETS. IT’S HER FUCKING BODY. ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A TATTOO ARTIST LIKE HOW CAN YOU SUPPORT TATTOOS AND THE BODILY AUTONOMY AND SELF EXPRESSION WHICH GOES WITH THEM BUT THEN MAKE EXCEPTIONS FOR WOMEN. FUCK. THAT. FUCK. YOU.
IF YOU’RE GONNA CRITICIZE ANY OF THESE TATTOO CHOICES, CRITICIZE THE DREAM CATCHER FOR CULTURAL APPROPRIATION. OTHERWISE FUCK THE FUCK OFF.
IF I WANT A CUTE ASS STEREOTYPICAL TATTOO IM GONNA GET ONE AND I WILL NOT NEED YOUR DOUCHY APPROVAL, YOU HUMAN BUTT-PLUG.
god bless u for acknowledging cultural appropriation